Long time no see.
Things are the same here, fights, loneliness,depression,fears,crazyness. You know the usual. But worse. Everytime is worse. And Im getting tired and tired everytime. I started the university almost 2 weeks ago. And its good. Im not that scare of my future now you know ? .
Oh, fuck. I have to get this out of my chest... I LIKE YOU. LIKE A LOT! .
unfortunaly he doesn't even know. I havent see him in 3 weeks or so. And well, I like him . I never felt this way before. And ... Im not that scare how I thought I'll be. And that's weird :/. But Is so stupid cause, I dont know anything about him. Just his name duh, and that his grandparent go to church. oh God thanks for that. But I wanna see him , so badly. I feel so stupid for that. blah. Blog Im gonna call you kurt ok. Just for this blog entry. Is just that I have a theme on univision that I call kurt. I guess that is like my imaginary friend or something. Yeah, Crazy <-- . Anyway, I started going to church yes, and is good. Its a good feeling , you know?.
Ok, an earquake happen, not in my city, but in my country. I really badly earthquake D: . and I always gonna remember that day cause, that was the day that I saw him again ssdhajkdhjahdjashdj *-* . Oh, fuck, see ? Im crazy. This is the story. I saw last year, for the bday of a little girl that was going to church. And yeah I like him there, I think of him a lot of days. But that was it. And then in like december or january I dont remember exactly I have this weird dream, I had a boyfriend, but I was gonna leave him because I wanna be with HIM. sasadsasdasd And then in february I saw him, and I was like asdajsdhhdajhda *-*. I like him . I well, we dont even talk though, yeah. we just look at eachother xDD. But he take me a picture. I think he did. Fuck , I like him. I LIKE HIM!!! *-* I dont know what to do. It all. According to my 11 years old sister , he likes me too. Yeah I dont know how the hell she's knows I like him or he likes me. But fuck it, that make me happy :).
But is stupid right ?, We spend an entire weekend together and we dont even talk. He could ask me for my e-mail or something but no. But he looks like a really nice and good guy. And my mom thinks that too. When we got there(the beach) on saturday in the morning, really early :/, the people from church and my family was already there. And she, my mom, ask for him, and she was so happy because he was there and I was like *-*. yeah I get so nervious when he looks at me, or when he was close to me D: . So stupid. I feel so stupid. That was the best weekend of my life. This summer was the worst of my life , but he make it so much better that what it was. The best weekedn ever. The best beach's Day's ever. I Was happy. And I really thought it was going to suck. Cause my parents was mad at each other. But I saw him, And I know that he dont think of me how I do, I know that he probably has a girlfriend and maybe he doesnt even remenber me. But I dont care, he makes me happy. When everything in my life is falling apart. I just Wish, I hope ...nothing. I pray to God, that he take care of him.
I really thought that this feeling was going away, but no, this two last days I been thinking a lot of him.
PD: When I think of him all the bad things in my life are gone. Just for a second Im happy...